


Cool Ranch

by GirLikeBurritos



Series: Kingsman Greek Life AU [1]
Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff and Humor, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-10
Updated: 2015-05-10
Packaged: 2018-03-29 23:28:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3914653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GirLikeBurritos/pseuds/GirLikeBurritos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Percival just wanted some Doritos to help him get through studying for Finals.  He wasn't planning on his hand getting stuck in the vending machine.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cool Ranch

**Author's Note:**

> The different positions of the house, like President, are the names of the knights. When someone run for a position, they're running for that name. Percival is the Treasurer and Galahad is the Communications Representative. Percival is in his 3rd year and James is in his 1st year. This takes place in Fall term.
> 
> Thanks to CP.Lyaios for beta reading this.

To say Percival was upset was an understatement. He had been up since 4 AM yesterday due to an emergency with his physic group's project and had been running around since, trying to get everything done in preparation for Finals Week. It didn't help that Arthur, the graduate student that was the president of their Kingsman Greek chapter, had demanded that everybody will help with the preparation for the initiation of the pledges. Percival had been forced to go on an errand run with Galahad, who couldn't decide what type of foods to get in fear of causing somebody to have an allergic reaction. After an hour of arguing, they agreed to get: a large gluten free pizza, a six-foot long sub sandwich, miso soup, and a sheet cake that was half vanilla and half chocolate.

It was now 7 AM and Percival wanted nothing more than to take a shower and sleep until his first exam tomorrow. But of course, life had other plans. Namely, in the form of an email from Percival's English professor, requesting that all of his students turn in their expected final paper along with a new essay, which was summarizing the turning point in literature from George Orwell to Stephanie Meyer. The email had Percival growling at his computer. It was a contrite task that added to his already growing list of tasks to do.

With both papers completed and in tow, Percival stood in the library's small alcove where the vending machines were. He was deciding which of the junk foods stocked would be more fulfilling if he wasn't going to be allowed to rest for the next few hours. Grimacing at the lack of trail mix, Percival shoved a five dollar bill into the machine and waited for his prizes.

The water bottle fell with a small thud to the bottom of the machine. Wanting to grab everything at once, Percival waited for the cinnamon pop tart to slowly unfurl from the black claw of the vending machine. Percival sighed with relief; glad that he would at least get some well needed energy from these unhealthy snacks. The man close his eyes as he placed his forehead against the glass, listening to the mechanical whirring of the machine and the crumpling noise of the Doritos bag, waiting for the expected cushioned thud of the bag.

Except it never did.

Dreading what he already knew to be true, Percival slowly opened his eyes. The Doritos bag was caught between the glass and the bottom row of snacks. The bag's logo and picture was glaringly obvious as it taunted Percival.

Gritting his teeth, Percival sank to his knees to fish out his water and pop tarts. Glaring at the offending bag, he considered his options. He deliberated on buying something else, in hopes that it would jar the bag free, but there is no guarantee that the tactic work. Plus, the five dollar bill was the last change that Percival had on him. He could go and get one of the librarians, though they'd most likely tell him that they can't help him. Of course, he could just reach up and try to grab it. In Percival's sleep deprived mind, this 'solution' sounded like the best choice.

Placing his face against the glass, Percival carefully regarded the drop area of the vending machine. It had no flap at the entrance, so the man wouldn't have to worry about getting his arm into the drop area. The flaps that kept people from reaching up and grabbing the lowest level of snacks, however, might be a problem. If Percival was careful, he might be able to grab the bag of chips without problem.

With an urging growl from his stomach, Percival manoeuvred both of his hands so that one of them was holding up the flaps, while the other reached up to grab the bag of chips. It was pretty simple plan, and with a hand wrapped around the bag, Percival thought that he had prevailed. That was easy, he thought to himself.

It wasn't until he tried to pull his hand and the bag of chips down that he realized just how wrong he was.

The flaps were designed so that items in the vending machine could only fall through the flap after being paid for and only for a limited period of time. At the moment, the flaps had locked up around Percival's hand, having a security method of locking up if somebody tried to reach their hand through the flaps to steal the lowest shelf's snacks.

Realizing that he wouldn't be getting his hand back anytime soon, Percival let out a frustrated growl as he smacked his head against the vending machine. Pulling out the hand that was holding the flaps open, Percival contemplated what he could do. If he tried to call for help in the library, he would be berated by one of the librarians for being stupid and for tampering with school property. He could try to call one of his Kingsman brothers to help him, though they would be teasing him about it for years to come. Knowing he didn't really have any other options, Percival pulled his cell phone out of his bag.

The battery was dead.

Percival slumped over in defeat. His pride wouldn't let him call out for help and he didn't know how long he could be there for before somebody else came into the little alcove. Leaning against the vending machine, Percival resigned himself to getting some much needed sleep.

Not more than a few minutes later, the sound of a camera taking a picture made Percival's eyes snap open. One of the Kingsman pledges was trying to keep from laughing as he looked at Percival. They stared at each other for a few moments before Percival squinted and spoke.

"Don't you dare send that to anyone." That seemed to push the other man over the edge, he doubled over and laughed. Percival scowled as he waited for the pledge to stop laughing.

Catching his breath, the pledge held up his hands in surrender as he walked towards Percival. "How'd you manage this?"

"Will you please just buy something from the machine so that I can go?" Percival asked, his patience having long since run out.

"Ah, ah," the pledge said, as he waggled a finger at Percival. "That's hardly how you greet a fellow Kingsman. What would Arthur say if he heard that one of his knights acted so rude in public, especially if it's to a pledge that looks up to the knights for guidance?"

By now, Percival honestly didn't care if he was rescued from the vending machine or not. Exhaustion was starting to catch up with his body.

"Whatever," the trapped man sighed as he went boneless. The pledge's eyebrows raised then furrowed as Percival gave up. He knelt down next to Percival.

"You're really giving up after having your picture taken like this?"

"No, I'm giving up because I've been up for 27 hours and I just want to go to sleep. But of course, the vending machine couldn't just give me my Doritos and, of course, I had to be a fool and try to grab them." Percival gave a weak scowl. "Now some pledge is making fun of my misery."

The other man stood up and stared at the vending machine for a bit. He pulled out a couple of coins and deposited them into the machine, pushing some buttons for something to fall. The flaps immediately released Percival's hand, which he let fall gracelessly to the bottom of the drop area.

"James," the other man said as he reached in and grabbed his bag of M&Ms. Percival massaged his wrist as he wearily regarded the other man.

Percival grabbed his well earned Doritos while James grabbed the rest of the other’s snacks. Slinging Percival’s bag over his shoulder, James started to pop M&Ms into his mouth and lead the way out of the library.

"Thanks," Percival mumbled, as he rubbed his eyes. The sun was too bright for so early in the day.

"No problem, Percy."

Stopping at the nickname, Percival glared at James, who gave a wide grin in return. James winked and continued on to the chapter house. Percival glared at his back as he followed him.


End file.
